Journal 21

Sometimes when things seem very unmanageable in my life, I feel the love of God strongly in so many little ways.

I have learnt to appreciate the love of God more in the little things of life.

I become encouraged because I know within me that God is speaking to me in the way that I understand him very loud and clear.

The more I listen to hear from him, the louder he speaks to me in ways that I cannot doubt him.

Before I go on rambling, I will tell you event that happened to me on the 26th of January.

I woke up with joints pain; I got ready and went to get blood test done as requested by my specialist nurse.

I got a test from one of my Magenta sisters (Female fellowship at regen Church) asking if I need a lift to Monday bible study, I said I was on my way to get blood test done, and I would go back home as I don’t feel very well.

She asked if I was on the bus and I said I arrived at the surgery where I want to get my blood text done, and there are two people before me.

She offered to pick me up and take me back home when I am done. I felt really blessed and knew that this was directed by the love of God in her heart for me.

When I left home for this routine blood test, I thought to myself I should have asked for a lift before now, but I carried the feeling of being a burden and not wanting to bother anyone on a Monday morning.

That thought was not of God really because I have been told many times to ask for a lift when I need one for my numerous hospital visits.

I guess I still struggle with coming to terms with not being able to do the things I would do without hassle in the past, and that in turn makes me feel like I am in the way of others who have busy week.

I know that does not sound rational, so I suppose it’s just a distraction from he who goes to and from looking for whom to destroy.

God knew I needed support to get home because I was struggling with pain and was pushing myself, in my head I have believed I am a burden.

That did not stop God from providing the much-needed lift, as he is a merciful God.

When my Magenta sister arrived, she asked if I was just going home to rest now. I said I was due for another dose of painkiller, then make myself a sandwich and rest after having something to eat.

I was surprised when she said I made you a sandwich, she pointed at it as she drove.

It was the exact sandwich I was going to make at home (Ham and salad on brown seeded bread) You can not imagine the surprise on my face as I looked at her, I do not see this as coincidence.

I know in my heart that this is God speaking to me, that I just have to keep trusting him for the little things because he cares for me more than I could ever imagine.

I thanked her and I do not even think she understood how God has spoken to me through her act of love and kindness towards me.

I had a visit from another lady who came to pray with me about two hours after I got home, and she brought up discussion about a lift for my appointment next week.

Later in the day I got a call from one of my daughters in church, asking for something else, but started to talk about lifts to my appointment all three conversations about support in one day definitely is not coincidence.

I felt the love of God fresh again, and I know I trust him to look after me as he has promised and to direct my path.

I was making a cup of tea to have with my lunch that was made for me; I looked outside my window and saw my neighbour looking into space.

I had this little conversation within myself to ask her to come have lunch with me, and then I thought she probably just want to be alone.

The more I thought about it the stronger I felt God wanted me to make her lunch.

I went out to say hello and invited her in to have lunch with me, she came in and I asked her what she wanted in her sandwich and made her a cup of tea.

We spent her lunchtime together and she went back to work.

I got a facebook message from her in the evening saying thank you, and she said how her day went fast after she left me.

She also said she had a smile through out the rest of her day so she is looking forward to having lunch again with me.

That for me was a great testimony of obedience and trust in listening to what God wants us to do.

I said it was a chain reaction of the love of God, my Christian sister made me lunch that blessed me so much, not because I cant make my lunch, but because God placed in her heart to make me the exact lunch I was going home to make, and she was obedient.

For me that was God saying I know what you re thinking and it is ok because I would help you, just trust me.

Jesus said if we have faith as small as a mustered seed whatever we say would come to pass.

He also said his sheep hears his voice and they follow him. When we are alert and obedient to God, there is great peace within us in the midst of chaos that cannot be explained.

I pray this would speak to you as it did to me in Jesus name, Amen.